I think that most of us love our kids. I know that I love both of mine so much, that I try to do everything I can to ensure their well-being. In spite of that love, though, I’m human and SOMETIMES it takes a heck of a lot of restraint to … focus on that … and not my feelings of overwhelming frustration. Or pain. Or random desires to vomit.
So, through out my few parenting years I have come up with a few sayings that I repeat over and over to myself in those trying times, to help soften the blow of motherhood. Enjoy!
“I am a mothering Goddess.”
This one is my most frequently used. Another alternate ending is ‘Rock Star’. Best said repeatedly in the mirror when you are close to tears after having your toddler melt-down (loudly) in public. Also does wonders for the soul after encountering those ‘helpful’ people who love the saying ‘Well, that’s not how WE used to do it.’ Of course they didn’t. Because they aren’t a mothering goddess like you are.
“Jesus, Buddha, Gandhi, Einstein, Mother Teresa (ect.) all pooped. (And probably a lot)”
I don’t care who you are, or what your kid eats- poop is gross. Even that non-horrible smelling breast milk poop. ( <– Weirdest observation ever.) Having a baby with a poop explosion can make you want to vomit multiple times while bawling your eyes out. The need at that moment is focus — I’d say focus on something other then poop, but thinking of things like chocolate cake while diaper changing ends badly. Then you look at chocolate cake and think of diaper changing. GROSS! Plus, for me at least, my thoughts generally tend to steer back around to poop. So, while wishing desperately that a 3 month old is able to be potty trained, I stick with the poop thought and make it a good one. Hey, everybody poops, right? Must be the mark of a good beginning!
“Hugging prevents hitting.“
This is actually, factually true. If you hug them right. And by right I mean like a freaking human straight jacket. No, seriously though, sometimes it’s hard to control that desire for a physical response to the parenting insanity. The idea is to put it in to a positive physical response. Hugging calms every one down and gives a physical outlet. Obviously not appropriate at every moment, but it’s one of my favorites.
“If my mother can naturally birth an 11 pound 6 ounce kid, then I can sure as hell do ______.”
She totally did, the birthing rock star that she is! I mean, I think about that and I go- Wow. What the heck can’t a woman do? Thinking about female empowerment is.. well… it’s empowering. Some of you have probably birthed some pretty darn big babies too. Or made it through c-sections. Tough cookies is what we women are. So when I look at my living room, or the boy’s bedroom (where apparently, a tornado frequents), or the toilet bowl that looks like it belongs in a college frat house instead of my own… well, I think about birth and how if women have gone through that and come out with smiles on their faces and love in their hearts, then I should certainly be able to tackle (and win!) the daunting task set out in front of me!
What words of self encouragement do you use to help get you through tough motherhood moments?
I LOVE “hugging prevents hitting.” Sometimes I get so worked up I just NEED to step away. I hate stepping away (since it makes me feel like I’m doing nothing). Maybe hugging is a better option. Then I’m actually doing something constructive!
Also, I always use the “If I could push out an 8 1/2 pounder naturally, I can…” I use this when I’m nervous about something. I was nervous about labor and I figure nothing can be more intense than labor so…!